Another Task Finished!

Well, I just finished up a series of fifteen new Brainfood Puzzles. This is enough to make it through the remainder of 2007.

The first of the new puzzles will appear tomorrow morning (Sept 1, 2007), and will appear at a rate of one-per-week, with a short break at Thanksgiving, and another short break at Christmas.

Feel free to stop in each week to try to solve the puzzles (and if you want, create a membership account and submit your solutions to be graded!)

Candid Camera Meets The Silent Movies...

Someone told me recently that I should watch the TV show "Just For Laughs". After he described the show to me, I said, "So it's like Candid Camera?"

"Well, not exactly..." But he couldn't exactly explain why it was different from Candid Camera.

And the answer is...it's "Candid Camera" meets a Silent Movie.

Unlike Candid Camera, this show doesn't give a single word of explanation of any of the gags. You have to be paying attention closely enough to figure it out for yourself (not that it's difficult to figure out what's going on - it's just different to not have it spelled out for you).

Furthermore, there is no dialogue in any of the clips - the audio is just a sound track and laugh track. The result is that your full attention focuses on the facial expressions of the "victims".

I watched it for the first time last night, and almost regretted it, because a couple times it got me laughing, which made my side hurt.

My favorite stunt was the one where they had a postal truck being driven down the road with a dog in the driver's seat. The expressions on people's faces were hilarious. But then it got twice as funny, because the truck stopped (the dog apparently was lost, and needed directions) and one of their actors stepped up and started explaining to the dog where he needed to go. That was when the onlookers' facial expressions were through the roof funny!

Anyway, I'll probably watch this show again - and hopefully next time it's on it won't hurt my sides!

The Pain Scale

So, when you're at the hospital, they do this odd thing where they have a zero-to-ten pain scale. Zero means you have no pain at all. Ten is the worst pain you can possibly imagine. And one through nine are anything in between.

And when they ask you what your pain level is, they expect you to answer with a number.

Seems kind of silly - is there some sort of unit of measurement I'm supposed to be using? And what sort of scale is it? Is it a linear scale? Quadratic? Exponential?

When I was in for my surgery, they added a third point to the scale...they asked me what number I would consider to be a "manageable" or "tolerable" level of pain.

Well, that seemed like a silly question, and seemed like whatever I chose was going to be pretty arbitrary, so I just said: "Five". Kind of "middle of the road", right?

It wasn't until after I was coming out of surgery that my foggy brain started to realize that this was actually a useful piece of information to have, because when they asked me what my pain level was, I didn't even need to consider for more than a second: I said "Six."

And my thought process was: Oh, please, let them give me some pain medication...hmmm...if I don't tell them a number higher than five, they probably won't!

So, it turned out to be useful to have that number. Even though the number itself was quite arbitrary, it's probably the most useful number on the entire scale.

Best Movie, 2007?

Question: Is it too early in the year to declare the "Best Movie Of 2007?" Of course, I was ready to declare the worst movie of 2007 the week Pirates of the Carribean III came out, so maybe August isn't so bad. Of course, it's not like I make a habit of declaring the best and worst of any year...the last time I declared a "Best Of", it was in November of 2004, when Finding Neverland came out, and I was confident that I wasn't going to see anything else the rest of the year that would match it.

ANYWAY...if you are a fan of fantasy...you really need to see STARDUST.

And with that, I'm not going to offer a single word of explanation or comment. This movie, I think, will be best experienced without any more explanation than you get from the movie's tagline: In a countryside town bordering on a magical land, a young man makes a promise to his beloved that he'll retrieve a fallen star by venturing into the magical realm.

So there you have it. Even if it doesn't turn out to be the best of 2007, it is certainly the best I've seen so far this year!

Now, I have to make a disclaimer - there is a possibility (though I doubt it) that I will change my tune in October, when a movie titled "The Seeker" comes out. This is a Walden Media production, and I hadn't heard a word about it, until today when I saw a preview for it. So what is it? I'll tell you what it is.

It is the movie version of The Dark is Rising

I am both exhilarated and terrified by the fact that Walden Media is turning my childhood favorite fantasy series into a movie. Exhilarated because it never occurred to me that anyone would ever do this.

Terrified because, based on what I saw of the preview, I am afraid that they have butchered it. Even if they faithfully follow the book (which I'm pretty confident that they haven't), I'm so afraid that their mental image of the book won't be anything like mine.

Regardless, come October, I will be going to see this one!

Another Picture Of Dr. Jonas

Dorothy just emailed me picture she took of me and Dr. Jonas this summer. This one gives you a little closer look at his face.



I'm at my parents' house right now - they're going away for a few days, and I'm house sitting for them. So, I'm pretty much spending the whole week here. :)

I just got a really nice email from a fellow named Francisco who lives in Portugal. He absolutely LOVED my Treasure Hunt at The Problem Site. He also solved it, which is quite amazing, because even for people whose first language is English, this is a diabolically difficult puzzle.

Gallbladder Surgery...

Okay, pretty soon I'll stop rambling on about my gallbladder. After all, I don't even have one any more, so what is there to say about it?

Oh, one thing I have to say to Josh F.: "No, you can't have my gallbladder!"

So here's my report of my day in the hospital.

7:00 Arrive at hospital, check in, start answering survey questions. One of the people who had questions for me complained that I gave boring answers. Every question was answered "No". Do you smoke, drink, have a heart condition, liver problems, blah blah blah.

8:15 Questioning is completed, and they leave me alone to read the book I brought with me ("Sandworms Of Dune") while I wait for my surgery, which was supposed to be at 9:00.

9:00 Someone poked their head in and said, "Have you seen your surgeon this morning?" "No." "Hmm. We haven't either."

9:30 They finally found my surgeon and put me under.

At some point later in the morning (I don't have a clue when!) I woke up to find someone leaning over me, holding me down by my shoulders saying, "It's okay, you can relax, the surgery is over, just relax, just lay still." Apparently I was tossing and turning like crazy as I was waking up.

It took me a very long time to wake up enough that I could concentrate on anything. I do remember having lunch though. Chicken (the driest chicken I've had in my life), mashed potatoes (with REAL BUTTER!!!) asparagus and...strawberry shortcake.

In the afternoon I tried to watch a movie, but they'd put me on oxycodone, which made me very drowsy. So I'd watch the movie for a couple minutes, then wake up fifteen minutes later, watch a couple more minutes...

I stayed at the hospital through supper time. Had chop suey (first hamburg I'd had in over a month and a half!), veggies, and a chocolate chip cookie. Mmmm Mmm! Chocolate chip cookie! :D

After that the surgeon showed up to chat with me and give approval for me to be released.

So, I'm at my folks' house now. Not sure how long I'll stay here...it's kind of nice to be waited on hand-and-foot. *grins*

My primary pains are in two places. The first is my belly-button, where they made the largest of the four incisions. The second is my right shoulder. When they do the surgery, they pump my abdomen full of gas (like I need MORE gas, right??) and one of the results of that is pain in the right shoulder. Does that make sense to you? I'm not sure it makes sense to me!

So, that's my story up to the moment. Now I'm going to go back to reading "Sandworms Of Dune".

Surgery Successful

*points at subject line*

Surgery successful, and I'm out of the hospital. I'll write more some other time!

Conversation About Surgery

Me: Well, tomorrow's the big day.
Millie: What's that?
Me: I'm having my gallbladder removed.
Betty: Oh! I thought he was going to say he was getting married!
Me: No, no...nothing so awful as that...it's just surgery!

Okay, here are a couple web pages I just added to Jeorge's Website today...

In Honor of Marshmallows and Pretzels
Jackson's Valentine's Day Cake Recipe

Tomorrow morning I go to the hospital at 6:30 AM. Once the surgery is finished, I'll be going to my folks house, where I'll stay until I feel like coming home again. I'll post something here when I feel like writing, or I'll get my folks to post something in the Quote Puzzler discussion forum.

Meanwhile, Arnold just called me and asked if I wanted to borrow the last Dune book. He just bought it, and hasn't even read it yet, but thought I might want something to read while I was recovering. Don't I have such nice brothers? :D

Pretzels - The Mathematical Snack!

I never used to be a fan of pretzels. That has changed, for two reasons. First, because it's a low fat snack, so I can eat it while I'm on my low-fat diet, waiting to have my gallbladder removed (I have a one-pound bag of fat free pretzels...mmm mmm!)

The other reason is that pretzels are a very mathematical snack. I kid you not.

I'll show you, in just a moment, why I say that. When you see what I mean, you're going to roll your eyes and say..."Doug has way too much time on his hands."

Just remember, I'm on vacation right now (sort of) and I'm relaxing after six weeks of camp ministry. If I want to kill some time doing stupid things...

I have a right to be stupid! :D

I think I'm also going to post this as one of the Easter Egg Pages at The Problem Site.

Okay, now are you ready to know why I say that Pretzels are a mathematical snack?



Brace yourself.



Prepare to be astounded and amazed.



Or at least to roll your eyes and shake your head in disgust.



Here it is...

Underdog, and surgery scheduled

Okay, so this afternoon I took Daniel to see Underdog. When I saw the previews for this one a few months ago, I thought "This looks pretty stupid."

Of course, stupid doesn't necessarily mean it's not funny...it's possible to be both stupid AND funny.

But the real deciding factor on whether to watch it was the imdb.com rating on the movie. Over a thousand members at imdb.com have cast their vote on "Underdog", and rated it at 3.3 out of ten.

And I thought, "If the members at imdb.com hate the movie that much, it might actually be pretty good!" :)

Daniel and I both enjoyed the movie. True, it was quite silly, and the flying dog looked quite unconvincing in the scene where he's learning to fly, but we enjoyed it.

On another subject, I'm going to have my gallbladder removed next Tuesday. Bright and early in the morning. I'm glad I decided not to go to Acadia this weekend...I'm going to be well rested on Tuesday when I go in for surgery!

Challenge The Premise

Somebody recently posted this survey, titled "Measure Your Fears - Would You, Wouldn't You, You Did"

As I glanced through it, I thought, this is a pretty silly survey...many of the questions have very little to do with your fears. But since it a survey about "Fear", people won't challenge the premise that these questions prove how much of a "fraidy cat" you are.

For example...

Would you perform surgury on your best friend

No of course I wouldn't. I want my friends to live. What does that have to do with FEAR?

Would you draw a mustache on the Mona Lisa with a permanent marker?

No, of course I wouldn't. I'm not a vandal. The implication of this question is that we are all vandals at heart, and only refrain from defacing brilliant works of art out of fear.

Would you go swimming during a thunder storm?

No, of course I wouldn't. I don't have a death wish. Is this survey implying that only fraidy cats choose not to do stupid things?

Anyway, here's the rest of the survey. Take the survey or not...it's your decision. If you do take it, just remember that it's a meaningless survey, because it doesn't tell you anything about what it's purported to tell you.

Would You...
Pet a snake: why would I? Snakes aren't cute and cuddly.

Spend a week in an empty room: no. I have too much I want to do with my life to waste a week sitting in an empty room.

Sky dive: probably not. I'm afraid of heights.

Sing in front of a huge audience: Sure. Of course, if I couldn't sing, I wouldn't do it, and it wouldn't have anything to do with fear.

Sit in the front seat of a roller coaster: sure

Deliver a baby: you mean, if there was no one else around who knew what they were doing? Yeah, I'd give it my best shot.

Swim across the Amazon River: I doubt I have the physical stamina for that - the Amazon is mighty wide.

Change careers: sure

Disappear for a long period of time: I don't get it. You mean, turn totally invisible? This question is designed to test your fear of invisibility?

Walk through the forest alone at night: sure

Join a space mission: meh. probably not. I'd have to waste a couple years training for it.

Tell everyone what you honestly think of them: sure

Call off your wedding: WHAT? I'm getting married? You better believe I'm calling it off - I don't even know who the bride is!!!

Walk naked through New York City for 10 minutes during rush hour: of course not. But what does that have to do with FEAR?

Walk up to Mike Tyson and call him a girl: of course not. I don't have gender confusion issues.

Disarm a bomb: you mean, if there was no one else around who knew what they were doing? Yeah, I'd give it my best shot.

CLean the outside windows of a skyscraper: If that was my job, sure. Otherwise, no.

Go on tour with Elvis: Uh...what purpose would there be in going on tour with a corpse?

Home At Last

Well, it's almost 11:00 PM on Friday night. And I'm tired. But I'm not so tired I can't at least post a short message here saying...

I'm Home At Last!

I love camp ministry. But I'm also ready for a break when it's all done. I figure I taught 1.22 Bible lessons per day in the last 41 days.

I'm preaching on Sunday at SPBC, but after that I'm looking forward to a bit of relaxation and vacation the next couple weeks. True, I do have a couple projects under deadline that I need to work on, but other than that, I'm going to be a vegetable for awhile!

Oh, and I have an appointment with my surgeon on Tuesday. Stay tuned...

Guitar Picture From Camp Good News

Carissa (a camper from Camp Good News) just sent me this picture of me playing the guitar outside the COW (Chapel On Wheels) at Camp Good News. I thought it was a pretty good picture. Mainly because you can't really see my face. ha ha.

Gallstone Symptoms?

Well, you'd probably think that once I spent a night in the ER, and was told I had gallstones, I would immediately go online to find out everything I could about them. Actually, though, since I've been at camp, my time online has been fairly limited, and when I've been home, I've had too much to do to spend much time browsing the internet.

But I spent a couple nights at home this week, so I finally got around to looking up gallstone symptoms. What I read made me realize, I've probably been suffering from gallbladder attacks since sometime last winter, and never realized it.

Turns out that, in addition to pain in the abdomen, gallbladder problems can also produce fever and chills. So all those times last winter and spring that I was down with stomach flu (fever, chills, stomach cramps) - in retrospect, I suspect that I was experiencing gallbladder attacks, and it was not stomach cramps I was feeling! I commented to a few people (and a few people made similar comments to me) that I was having a rough winter/spring because I kept coming down with every bug that was going around.

The scary thing is that when gallbladder attacks are accompanied by fever and chills, that's when you're supposed to contact your doctor immediately, because it can mean that bile is getting backed up in the liver. So I probably spent a better part of my winter/spring teetering on the edge of jaundice and didn't even realize it.

No wonder I've felt exhausted all the time - probably had as much to do with my health as the work load I was trying to keep up with...

All those times in praise team practice when Rachel looked at me and said "Are you okay?" And I said "I'm just really tired..." it was probably a bit more than that...

My attack I had at camp was far more severe in pain, but had no fever/chills symptoms. Now I understand why the doctor told me that if I had additional symptoms I should come right back to the ER.

The other interesting thing I found is that gallbladder attacks can produce a pain not in your side, but in your back - either between your shoulder blades, or under your right shoulder. And now I remember a month ago thinking that I'd pulled a muscle in my back...now I'm not so sure that's what happened...

Friday morning I went to the hospital (scheduled trip this time!) for an ultrasound. The technician couldn't discuss with me what she was seeing, so don't ask me about the test results - I won't know until next week. But once I get those test results, we should be able to schedule my surgery. Hopefully that will be soon. Everyone who has had their gallbladder removed has said to me: "You won't believe how much better you'll feel once it's gone!"

I'm looking forward to that!

On a completely different subject, I had a really great week at camp. I so much enjoyed the group of campers. They were attentive in chapel, and grateful and appreciative. And a lot of fun. One of the "tribes" practically adopted me, which was nice...even though they kept calling Jeorge a PARROT, instead of a dodo bird!